★ Saya sayang awak :)
iloveyouahmadmuzaffar!

I always do :)
For everything that'd happened. I'm over the moon cuz you're still loving me. Thanks sayang :)
Saya sakit hati, awak sakit hati. Saya marah, awak pun marah. Tapi, saya tak pernah pun benci awak. Saya tak boleh benci awak. You're just too precious. I want you forever :')

Maybe skrg feeling kita half half sbb baru lepas bergaduh. Tapi thanks sbb awak cakap awak akan cuba untk jadi mcam dluu. And you treat me a zillion better than yesterday. I know that I could manage myself to live on without you but I can't stand it meeting you as a friend. I want you at your best and also at your very worst.

' Sayang sayang . Saya dah maafkan awak. Saya yg ptt minta maaf
dkat awak . Sbenaqnya awak ni baik . Cuma nakal sikit ja .
Biasa la remaja . Haha . Jgn mcm ni nah ? Marah2 saya pn
saya ttp syg awak :) '

Mmg patut pun perasaan awak half-half. I've treated you harshly. I'm so sorry. I'm pissed off. I'm so mad. And I didn't mean it at all. Untuk pangkah2 awak, untuk perli2 awak, untuk ignore awak, untuk berkata2 kejam terhadap awak dan untuk menyinggung perasaan awak. Sumpah saya tak bermaksud pun. Saya cuma geram. Saya cuma nak awak rasa apa yang rasa time tuu. Saya nak awak faham saya. Yeah, saya kejam. Tapi, awak tak pernah layan saya lebih kurang. Terima kasih. Saya bersalah sangat sekarang ni. Saya cuba untuk buat yang terbaik kali ni. Let's start a new chapter shall we? I won't say any harsh words anymore. I won't. I'll treat you nicely and even better ! I want you and I really need you. Cuz you're the one that I got. I realize that I'm totally nothing without you. I want to grow old with you. I want you to be the Imam in my every Solat. I want you as my halal soul mate. I do and I'm willing to be patient with your anger or anything in order to keep you with me forever.
' From this minute, second and beat, I promised you that I'll try my
best to give you my all. And Ahmad Muzaffar, I want you.
Tomorrow, the next day, next week, next month,
next year and forever :) '

0 comments.
★ Prank Call
BANGANG WOI BANGANG !

Si pelik : Hello hello. Boleh kite cakap dgan Ayan gemuk pendek tombam comel seksi?
Me : Err ni sapa ni? Gila kot. Tak bagi salam tetiba seqebuu akuu.
Si pelik : Sape lagi kalau bukan lelaki yang terhensem dekat semesta. Hikhik
Me : Fuck ah. Whos this. Nak mati kot. Jangan main2 ni !
Si pelik : Ilebiuu gemuk hikhokkkk :D
*AKU MARAH DAH AKU LETAK. BEBAINYAAA*

And text masuk
Him : Hahaha, ni Fazun laa. Fuzz fuzz :)
**and i was like asdfghjkl ~ Ishh goram goram!

And he called me again.
Him : Hai sayang! Hihihihihi. Skype jum !
Me : Okay good. Boleh tlg I dengan debate ni. You kan the best. Hihi.
Him : anything for my moks moks. Cepat ah on, I tggu ni Yan :)

OKAY TAK SEMBANG PASAI DEBATE PUN. I CRIED AND HE COMFORTED ME !

Him : You, please. Jangan macamni. I kan ada. Semua orang ada untuk you. I dah break lah you :")
Me : Erkk really? Bukan you sayang dia gila ka?
Him : I don't. I heart you the best. Dammit, kenapa you tak faham2 lagi?
Me : Hmm, I err surely err don't know. Hmm.
Him : Siti Nur Raihan. I tak mintak you untk terima I. I just nak you happy mcam dulu.
I sentiasa ada untuk you. I tggu you. I sayang you tahu . You je.
Me : If you told me earlier. I would accept you. But I can't. I don't have any
courage to try. I just didn't believe it anymore.
Him : blabla *aku lupa X____X

EVENTHO AKU TGH HEARTBREAK. AKU TAU SEMUA ORANG ADA UNTUK AKU. SEMUA. THANKS YOU GUYS. THANKS XAN FOR THOSE SWEET WORDS. THANKS YOU OLS SBB CALL AKU. THANKS <3

0 comments.
★ The you
Perkataan awak yang menikam jantung saya. Perkataan awak yang menghentikan degupan jantung saya. Perkataan awak yang membuat saya rebah ke tanah. Perkataan awak yang menyedarkan saya hanya seorang Raihan.

Yeah, you killed me. You tortured my feelings. You just don't give a damn about me. Saying that you really miss your ex. Saying that you got two girls in your heart. Nothing could hurt me even better than you. The most person that I love. The one that makes me smile. The one that gave me hopes. The one that also broke my heart into pieces just now. That makes me cry even hard than losing someone. You just don't know how much I felt right now. What are you? Why are you being this way? Why don't you tell me earlier? Why are you doing this to me and you don't even regret of it. I'm so down right now. I really do. I makes me think that I'm a slut, whore and useless bitch. Say it right to my face. Call my name and say that you didn't even mean for what you've told right now - that you missing her. How could love be so thoughtless so cruel? Just lemme live. Lemme breath. Give me some space. Give my heart a break. Not a heartbreaking useless fcking assy saucy shitness mess~

Earlier I've told you that I'm willing to sacrifice my feeling/love/emotion for you. If leaving me and be with her is the best. Then do it. I'm okay. I'll be fine. I know I will, someday. I'll forget you. I'll move on and praying you the best with her. I'm the type of person that really care of other's happiness even by sacrificing mine. Even sacrificing my love towards you. You meant the world to me. You're everything. But somehow, you didn't feel the same way. As what I did. I'm just me. I'm just this useless Raihan. The one that is fat, short, ugly, bastard and whatever shit on Earth. I'm nothing like her. I'm no one. And that is why I don't really mind if you say those words again. Cuz who tha fuck am I to make you forget her? I'm nobody after all. Unlucky me.

So now, please, decide the best and live on. I won't say those words. I won't dump you. I've promised you that I will always love you and would never say a goodbye. I'll keep my words. I'll do it. So if you don't love me. Come on, just leave me. And I'll try to move on. I promise you. And baby, I won't change my facebook's password. Saya cuma akan tukaq bila saya dah boleh lupakan awak. Okay?

I've been waiting for this day, the day that you realize,
that you deserve a better girl to rule your
heart. This day is real somehow.
I don't deserve you at all.
I'm the pathetic me :')

0 comments.
★ Ahmad Muzaffar :D


Hewhew, oh hey people :3
My ass is gettin bored T______T whatever k :)

Ah, that guy. He's my miumiumiumiu BOYFRIEND. Sorry Tasha sorry Mon sorry Bobo sorry semua I lied. I told you that I'm dating nobody. I'm sorry. I hope that this one lasts. So sbb tuu nak rahsiakan duluu. Tunggu 3 bulan lebih2 baru nak hihih isytiharkan. Biasalah, artis kan. What to do kheeeen? Hihi so again, I'm sorry. I really am! :')

Before I met him. I don't trust in love and that such of things. I believe that there's no such thing as love and even worst, I believe that being faithful is boring and out of fashion. Giving your mate full of commitment is blerghh, stupid -..- My life was great cuz I'm so good at breaking guy's heart. I really am good at it ! But I realize that my life is meaningless in another word, LIFELESS, HOPELESS and HEARTLESS. But whatever. I never ever want to be in love. I need no one. Not even one guy ever pass that such of level. I don't really give em hopes. But they're hoping me to give them love and that such of thing. Fuck, its so cheap. You can't believe people that easy man. You don't know me so please don't blame me for breaking your heart.

But it was before I met him. Things completely changed when he was dumped by his ex-girl. We spend a lot of time together. Acting foolishly, being crazy, yell to each other, comfort each other and even went for a night out together. But don't get me wrong. We went out with my sibs and sister's friends. The double the trouble. HAHA, seriously, it was fun. Kacau pondan, kacau orang, tak balik rumah. HAHA, so crazy. I never knew that I'd fall for someone that is very JERK, ANNOYING, HARSH, SHORT, SIMPLE, HEARTLESS AND EVEN WORST HE GOT NO MERCY. Everyday is like a war ! WE FIGHT and FIGHT but lastly mestilah baik. HAHA xD I never been this long with a guy. Seriously. I get bored easily. But when it comes about Muzaffar, its different. Really. He's the first guy that ever makes me cry out loud. He could even makes me smile for no reason. He could makes me giggles for a silly joke. He's nothing like my ex-BF. Nothing sweet, nothing rich, nothing cool. But seriously, he's the best that ever happen in me. The one that I won't ever regret to be with. I want to grow old with you ! I'm not joking when I told you that I really need you. You're like the air that I breathe. I pray for you, for us and for our future. Maybe I'm nothing that good if compared to your ex. But baby, can't you see that I'm trying my best to give you my all? Seriously, you're perfect to me. You completed me. I thanked God for giving me such of time to meet you, to laugh with you, to cry with you, to cuddle with you, to hug you and to kiss you. I wish for nothing. I wish for no one. But I'm wishing for you, all the time.

Maybe all of you will say that its wasting time to fall for someone at this age but seriously, he inspired me to be a better person. Just to prove him I can be better. I'm trying my best in everything. He taught me how life works. He taught me to appreciate people. He taught me how could love be so thoughtless, so cruel. He gave me hopes to keep on living and his existence always reminds myself to be faithful to each other. I need nothing more than I need him. He's like my morphine. I'm getting addicted and the addiction kept growing.

Maybe you don't realize this.
But you're,
MY ADDICTION,
MY HEARTBEAT,
MY SUNSHINE,
MY ONLY BF,
MY LOVE,
MY BREATH,
MY ANOTHER HALF,
MY HUNNY,
MY AHMADMUZAFFAR! :D

0 comments.
★ Down to Earth

Ohhai ohhaiiiii :)

Just now tetiba kan nak sedih. Nak buat mcamna kan. Tak boleh nak control. Tulaa kan aku dah cakap, jangan duk mengusik aku. Aku tgh emo. Tapi kau ngusik jugak. Haaa, padah ! Tapi thanks weh Amy, Ruff and Xan sbb buat aku happy balik :D Arigatouuu ne :) Aishiteru yo ~

Rafeq : Ah no matter how short you are , bagi aku kau cantik , comel, baik dan yang paling penting , KAU WANGI . Aku sayang kau tau Raihan .

Amy : Kau ni, tayah ah nak amik pusing sangat dengan emosi kau. Please, kau seriously segak. Kau nak kisah hape? Sorg pergi, 2 datang. Okay? Kan Xan adaaaa. Kau mmg tak cantik macam dia, tetapi kau attractive. Beautiful in your own way :)

Xan : Heh yang, you ni suka fikir benda bukan2 tauu. Biaa jee kat dorg nak talk shit about you. Mmg you tak secantik Zulaikha tetapi you're my little angel. The angel of my day and night. You're my perfection. My almost perfect baby. Serious i rasa you cantik comel gemuk PENDEK GEBU


Okay serious hihi best gila bila tiap2 malam ada orang puji. Hihi then Xan cakap, I'm better with tudung. Kihkih and I said, I can't. Its not the perfect time lagi. Sbb bila aku dah nak pakai tudung, aku dah takmau ada boyfriend. Skrg ni, aku tak bersedia lagi nak tinggai life aku yang serious bebas gila. Aku nak berubah slow2 :')
Ah you guys, thanks :D Thanks jugak Xan sebab Iris tadi. Seriously, sweet to death. Kihkih. Aku sayang korang semuaaaa. My ebelitingg !

And all I can taste is this moment,
And all I can breathe is your life,
And sooner or later it's over,
I just don't want to miss you tonight.

0 comments.
★ B l a c k

Hihihi, I can't sleeep ! Omooo, jahat benar2 jahat laa Xan dgan Ruff ~,~ Oh btw, Ruff tu rafeqq ~ HHAHAHA xD NAMA BARU RUFF xD

Tgh duk skype elok2 tetiba blackout ~ Danggg, terkejut serious terkejut. Then bolehh pulak kan duk mengusik-ngusik. Takpaa laa cek oii. Kena hari aku hampa bising nohh .________.

Okay actually, Rafeq yang suruh post menatang ni. Okay Rafeq sbb aku kalah kan just now.Hmm, okay. Mari mulakan.

Rafique Adha seorang yang :
Handsome, penyayang, caring, baik hati, suka menolong orang, sangat kacak, putih melepak, tinggi lampai, sangat wangi, mempunyai senyuman yang manis, gigi yang tersusun cantik. Hmm

OKAY DAH !
Raihan Zabidi seorang yang :
Pendek, tak comel, gemuk, hitam, tak lawa, jahat, suka buli orang, senyuman yang kelat, takdak gigi. HMMMM ~

Dah ah tuu, aku dah buat dah kan? Lai lai, kau janji nak bagi ! Sekarang ah bagi. Kalau kau tak bagi, aku aku hihihi siap laa kau. Deyy minachii ! Cepat aaaaaa :(

And Ashraff Hakimi, err I lap yuhhh sho muccchhh. Tapi sorry, I just erghh can't :')

0 comments.
★ S S
' Wee wee Ayan yan yan ! Xan minat kauu :) '


HAHA xD Kol orang tak bagi salam terus cakap benda ni T.......T
Okay budak ni mmg kalut sikit. No wonder ebelibodi panggil dia as cabbage head :P
HAHA xD So yeah, Xander please please. Jangan laa cakap dekat semua orang. I malu laa x___x Seriously, kenapa you pergi cakap dekat tempayan ni?! Dia ni mulut tak reti tutup ni ! Heshh. But whatever, Ashraff a.k.a Xander :)

Thanks sbb you selalu buat I gelak. Yeah yeah, I sangatlah tension dengan BF I but bila you ada, I happy k :) So Muhammad Ashrafffffffff, daisuki dayoo. Manis betul laa cara awak mengorat saya. Hehehe, so please wait for my answer, TONIGHT :) I'll say the word !


*sorry post ni untuk Amylia Qistina, Rafique Adha dan my sweetheart, Muhammad Ashraff Hakimi B Rozaini :)

Ah you guys, marilah kita dating malam ni. Kita Skype beramai2 :) Ah I love you guys to death :D

0 comments.
★ Death

Its something that you can't control. Something that you have to let go whether you're ready for it, or not at all. Hmm, I've lost someone that meant the world to me. Someone that inspired me. Someone that used to be my strength. And he's my Tokwan. I used to be his favorite granddaughter. He loved to comb my hair. He hugged me whenever I cried. Whenever I need something to cuddle with.

Ya Allah, whatever happened. He's the best damn thing that ever happened in me. No matter how far he is right now, I'd never forget him. No matter what happen. He taught me whats life is. You're the melody of my songs. You know, my life is a mess right now. And I need you. I really do. I miss you like seriously missing you. I'd do anything just to hold you for the last time. I'd do anything just to see that smile again. But I know, I wouldn't be able to. But just now. Really. Alhamdullilah. After solat. I fell asleep. And I don't know whether it was real or not. But I saw him walking towards the toilet for wuduk. Then I saw him praying in front on me. On my sejadah. After he done praying, he smile at me and kissed me at the forehead. But things happened too quick. And he's gone. But still, I could feel the warmth of his kisses. I cried. And still crying, right now. I miss him. Eventho that wasn't real or whatever, I'm more than glad. At least, I could feel him just for a moment. Even for a while. It worth it !

My Lord, thank you. Thank you for giving me this such of opportunities. I'm so happy. There's no word could ever express this such of happiness. And thank you Allah. Thank you :')

I'll be missing you as much as I can. I love you :')

0 comments.
★ Counting DAYS :D

As you can see, I'm counting days :)
Weh cepat laa sebelas hari bulan. Weh cepat laa BIGBANG punya album keluaq. Weh cepat laaaa ! HAHA xD Aku pun taktau aku duk minx kat sapa. Muahaha.

Miao, I couldn't sleep. Dammit, ni sbb tidoq siang ah ni T_____T next time, no tidur tidur in the evening. Okay marilah kita bercakap tentang garang. Hihihi. Dalam kelas pun orang cakap aku garang. Sebenaqnya serious aku BAIK gila dan aku lansung TAK GARANG. Garang-garang comel gituew. Not sayin' that I'm comel. HAHA. Tapi takpalah kalau nak puji ai comel puwnz. Hihihi.

Tadi cikgu suruh aku kutip buku. Mmg lama dah duk geram dengan Akmal SHASHAbudin ni. Aku pang jugak dia ni satgi ! Hehh, aku minx buku kat dia elok2 dia boleh duk buat lawak bodoh hat mmg tak bodoh. Pehtuu buat muka minx luku ! Sbb terlalu fanas macam fakap, aku qebut buku dia henthen aku ketuk kepala dia dengan buku. Walaupun kena jinjat tapi takpala, aku satisfied :D All done. HAHAH, pehtuu usha aku panaih. Awat ingat takut dengan hang?! Mai ah kalau berani. Aku bukak silat aku satgi haa haa haa >,<

Okay actually, me counting days macam di atas tadi sudah dimaklumkan. Bukan apa, kalau sebelas hari bulan ni, cukup 3 bulan. Weh first time aku boleh bertahan lama. Fuhh, terbangga sat k .__________. kalau sebelum ni nak sampai sebulan pun payah. Hihihi, tapi kali ni aku tau dah sbb apa. Harituu dia masak, dia buat nasik terkangkang ah tuu. Tau dah. Suka duk bomoh2 orang. So, I'm currently under his spells :P Dak ah aku tipu, my love towards him is deadly real and Ya Allah, if he's the one, I'm more than happy :') So macam aku janji dengan Tasha, aku aku aku akan reveal the truth. Kihkih. Aku letak gambaq then cakap sikit2 then DONE. Sbb risau jugak kan, satgi ter ter tersemua orang tau pulak. Taknok lah, I hope that this one is for real so, bila dah nak kawin nanti baru nak tell the world. Aiseeh ayat QETIS gila kay? HAHA xD

Kinda sleepy over here so baby, let's sleep and hoping for a better day, TOMORROW :)
You know, I really need a nice sleep since I didn't sleep like 3 days already. Bukan tak tidur lansung tapi, tidur pukui 3 almost 4 and bangun dalam 6.30 for Subuh then dah tak boleh tidoq T___T hmm, so sad. But whatever, my Bio's homework is deadly done and I'm so happy to death. Okay people, let's sleep. Heee n______n

0 comments.
★ L-O-V-E



I'm sorry for everything that I'm not but I'm deadly sure that you know, I'm loving you with everything that I have. My heartbeat, my whole life, my another half, my perfection, my superguy, my superlover, my most addiction, my only love. Saya minx maaf sebab saya tak dapat jadi yang terbaik tapi saya janji, saya akan cuba untuk buat awak happy. Saya sayang awak, sangat2 :') Terima kasih, untuk semua yang awak berikan. You know, there's nothing could ever replace you. You never know how much your love affected me. You're my only obsession. I won't give the shit up on you ! Never ! Darling, please be mine. Forever :')


P.S : Sorry Natasha, its not time yet to reveal the real BOYFRIEND of mine :) Just wait for our 3rd anniversary :) I'll show the world ~

0 comments.
★ Movieeee ~

Oyeah, terubat rindu yang tidak dirindui :P
Dak serious tak rindu pun. Lalala ~ Ah, lastnight pergi tengok wayang bersama kekasih hati, Nanad Ariff and also my lil braaah, Nani :D

Tengok cerita yang yeah haram tak best. Hihihi, si kekasih hati belanja makan, cekelat Skittles, and also belanja apa tetauu. Lupaaa. And me, belanja dia tgk muvieee. Wahahah x) Macam good2 jee. Sebelum tengok movie kena amik si budak kecil dekat tusyen duluu. So lepas Nad and hihi sayang siap main bowling, we ols berjalan p Tuisyen Bina. Then sementara tggu tuu pi makan duluu. Me tak makan okay. Nad and hihi jee makan. Takpa2, jumpak Kak Aisyah and taktau sapedia. Hihihi, maluwwww, depa puji2 pulak. Ihhh blushing ni :P

Chronicles start pukui 7 then terus p sana then amik tiket wayang henthen yada2 masuk wayang. Me duduk sebelah kekasih, kekasih duduk sebelah Nani, Nani duduk sebelah Nad. Oyeah, wayang celaka tuu sangat sejuk T_T Takpa2, cerita tuu boring sangat. Hewhewhew. Then si Nani ni bising bila nampak aku hihihi dengan kekasih hati. HAHA xD

Sbb kekasih hati pun bosan tahap, dia mengambil BB aku dan meng-online~ Haha xD Shial. Dan aku tidur. Kroghh kroghh. HAHA xD Dah habihh tuu boy menjerit C** P**K bangunnn ! Pehtuu depa gelak. Hewhew. Macam apa lagi. Baik aku tidoq dekat rumah kalau aku tau cerita tuu bosan tahap -..- rugi jaa RM30 aku. Kalau makan pun kenyang. Kalau beli baju pun boleh. Kalau aku bel komik pun jalan. Hmm hmm, rugi k rugi !

And oyeah, aku ba ba ba haaaa gi gi gi aaaaaa ~ :D
Eventho' takdak benda sangat untuk dibahagiakan tapi suka hati laa aku nak bahagia. Kalut apaaaaa?! :P

I'm FUCK YOU ! -Skrillex

0 comments.
★ Messed up

Why you just turn away when I need you? Please, tell me. If everyday, we keep on fighting, it'd come an end. Trust me. You always being a jerk. But I'm still being cool. But I know, I couldn't be cool forever, right? I love you and I love this relationship, US. But, did you? What is going on? I don't know you. No, not anymore. You're acting weird. If you've already 'muak' with me, just say so. Seriously, I'll be gone. I'm totally confuse of you.

For what we've been thru, I couldn't leave you. But I'm tired of you and your attitude. I want to be with the old you. The old person that I'm dating with. It seems so hard for you to treat me nicely. Why? Am I that hideous for you? AM I?! Look at me, I'm so miserable. Thinking of what I should do just to keep you with me. For what I've done to you, you never appreciate it. You never know how stubborn I am. You never know how childish I am. You never know how hard for me to keep on being patient and always being a fucking nice person just to be with you. Just to make you happy. I sacrifice my happiness for you. I sacrifice my pride and begging for your apology. Isn't it enough? You gave me a little of happiness but too much pain that I gain from you.

I didn't say that I'm good enough, NO. Just don't get me wrong. But I know, there's nobody could love and care about you like I do. There's nobody could stand with your cruel and harsh attitudes. Nobody could replace you. I told you that I'd love you for whatever you are. And yes, I'm keeping my words. I'm loving you with all my hearts and souls. I put my anger, temper, pride and happiness aside just to make sure that you're happy all the time. You said ' benda kecik pun awak merajuk'. Well awak, perkataan kasar awak tuu keterlaluan. Saya perempuan. Saya sensitif. Maybe saya selalu berkelakuan kasar tetapi deep inside me, I'm a soft-hearted person. Kalau saya merajuk, awak tak pernah pujuk. Awak akan buat saya lagi sakit hati. Saya bukan kawan awak ! I'm your fucking girlfriend !

OKAY DONE. YEAH MMG AWAK TAKKAN BACA PUN. SUKA HATI LAA. SEKARANG NI, SAYA DAH MALAS NAK BERLEMBUT DENGAN AWAK. SAMPAI BILA SAYA NAK MENGALAH. KALAU SAYA JAA YANG DUK JAGA RELATIONSHIP NI, ITS NOTHING THEN.

0 comments.